Willie Nelson's tour bus was pulled over this weekend and police found a pound and a half of pot and some mushrooms. 73 year old Willie and several passengers (including a 79 year old man) were arrested and cited. 73 and 79 - they should be high fived and not arrested. I hope I'm still a rebel (many may claim that I no longer am and maybe never was) when I'm that old. I wonder if at that age you eat more (in brownies for example) to benefit from the fibre.
I can just imagine the conversations. "Bummer! Bad case of the munchies and I can't find my teeth. Where's the blender." "Dude. Where's my walker." Rock on Willie.
Monday, September 18, 2006
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Smokin Dope with Mom
A woman in the US pled guilty to charges that she smoked dope with her 13 year old son as a reward - for things like finishing his homework. Geez, times have changed. When I was 13 I got an allowance and to go out at night if I did my homework and some domestic chores. I expect that if I got caught smoking dope I'd have gotten in trouble (in fact I did but I was a bit older). I expect that I would have worked a bit harder at math and guitar practice if Mom and I had sat down for a joint and some Doritos when I finished. Then again maybe not.
What is she thinking? Pot for homework. Meth for a good test? A case of beer for a nice report card. A hooker for graduation? A whole new incentive model. hey it might work.
What is she thinking? Pot for homework. Meth for a good test? A case of beer for a nice report card. A hooker for graduation? A whole new incentive model. hey it might work.
Condi Rolls Up the Rim
There are pictures all over the news of Condoleeza Rice, the US Secreatary of State, joining Foreign Minister Peter "No Merger" McKay at a Tim Hortons this morning. The quintesential Canadian experience.
No word on whether Condi thought she could roll up the rim to win the war:
1) on terror
2) in Afganistan
3) to hold onto the Senate and the House in November.
Clearly she was disappointed that the promotion hadn't started yet so all she got was a large regular and a box of Timbits.
No word on whether Condi thought she could roll up the rim to win the war:
1) on terror
2) in Afganistan
3) to hold onto the Senate and the House in November.
Clearly she was disappointed that the promotion hadn't started yet so all she got was a large regular and a box of Timbits.
Suri You Jest
Maybe I'm just jealous but isn't it just a bit ridiculous that Suri Cruise is getting so much attention? Aren't the daily newpaper articles and talk show mentions for an infant Suri Cruise a bit of overkill. Here is even gets a For Rant mention. Her only claim to fame is that she's the newborn daughter of the increasingly creepy Tom Cruise.
STOP IT!!! I promise this is the last you'll hear of it from me. I mostly just wanted to use the clever headline.
STOP IT!!! I promise this is the last you'll hear of it from me. I mostly just wanted to use the clever headline.
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Naked Drive Through
I've never played organized football. I think, though, that coaches preach discipline and good decisions. A Detroit Lions coach is going to have to re-establish his credibility with the team and the fans.
Its bad enough that he was arrested for drinking and driving a couple of weeks ago. This week though he set himself apart from even Mel the anti-semite. He was arrested for driving around naked. The really silly part of it is that he got caught because he drove through the Wendy's drive through. You've got to be either dumb or really pissed (or some combination of both) to go through a drive thru naked and not expect anyone to notice. Where will you put your change? I simply can't imagine being drunk enough get naked and drive to Wendy's. Perhaps he should consider rehab. Maybe Paris Hilton will drive him out for a burger.
Its bad enough that he was arrested for drinking and driving a couple of weeks ago. This week though he set himself apart from even Mel the anti-semite. He was arrested for driving around naked. The really silly part of it is that he got caught because he drove through the Wendy's drive through. You've got to be either dumb or really pissed (or some combination of both) to go through a drive thru naked and not expect anyone to notice. Where will you put your change? I simply can't imagine being drunk enough get naked and drive to Wendy's. Perhaps he should consider rehab. Maybe Paris Hilton will drive him out for a burger.
Take a Taxi - You can Afford it.
It sure seems as though we're hearing more and more about celebrities getting caught drinking and driving. These people have publicists, body guards, entourages and various other hangers on - doesn't someone have the brains or guts (or both) to tell them not to drive away? Don't they have a driver/chauffeur? No cash for a taxi?
Mel Gibson got pissed and decided to go cruising. Hey we've all been pissed. But cabs are usually available. He made a bad decision and then got busted. OK that's not happened to me but I can see how it might happen. BUT, screaming obscenities and blaming it all on Jews seems a tad over the top. Maybe Mel was really pissed (even more scary) but somewhere in that thick skull an alarm must be going off -"Hey you're famous and you're pissed - don't say anything stupid." Tighten the filter a bit if "It's all the f&&%%ng Jews fault." is making it through. I feel no pity. Its just stupid and if it wasn't Mel the guy would be in even more trouble.
Paris felt a bit peckish the other night (she hadn't eaten all day) and goes out for late night drive through. He I did that when I was in my early 20's too (just to be clear though I didn't make sex videos that ended up on the web). But Paris - hey maybe you get pissed easily. Maybe you're just a crappy driver. Maybe you were masturbating on the way. Whatever. You got busted and failed a sobriety test - likely an IQ test too but that's another issue. The celebrity whose only claim to fame is fame is now complaining about the attention. Paris - take a cab (it leaves one hand free for the cell phone and the other for whatever you need it for) or order delivery.
Folks. Call a cab or just let a groupie take you home.
Mel Gibson got pissed and decided to go cruising. Hey we've all been pissed. But cabs are usually available. He made a bad decision and then got busted. OK that's not happened to me but I can see how it might happen. BUT, screaming obscenities and blaming it all on Jews seems a tad over the top. Maybe Mel was really pissed (even more scary) but somewhere in that thick skull an alarm must be going off -"Hey you're famous and you're pissed - don't say anything stupid." Tighten the filter a bit if "It's all the f&&%%ng Jews fault." is making it through. I feel no pity. Its just stupid and if it wasn't Mel the guy would be in even more trouble.
Paris felt a bit peckish the other night (she hadn't eaten all day) and goes out for late night drive through. He I did that when I was in my early 20's too (just to be clear though I didn't make sex videos that ended up on the web). But Paris - hey maybe you get pissed easily. Maybe you're just a crappy driver. Maybe you were masturbating on the way. Whatever. You got busted and failed a sobriety test - likely an IQ test too but that's another issue. The celebrity whose only claim to fame is fame is now complaining about the attention. Paris - take a cab (it leaves one hand free for the cell phone and the other for whatever you need it for) or order delivery.
Folks. Call a cab or just let a groupie take you home.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Athletes and fighting
There is always much debate and some handwringing in discussions of fighting in hockey. I am not a big fan of hockey fights but at least these guys can fight. Too many other athletes embarass themselves when they get into it on the field.
A recent case in Indy Racing League is a perfect example. I expect that as good young Canadian lads, both Alex Tagliani and Paul Tracy laced up skates at some point. They likely weren't in any hockey fights though. Paul Tracy pulled a bonehead move on the track recently and Alex took exception. They argued and ended up in a scuffle. It was horrible to watch. They ended up flailing at each other like girls (with apologies to girls who can actually fight). Two men doing the windmill at each other while wearing helmets is just embarassing.
Basketball players are horrible at it too. And they are the master of the cheap shot. They should, however,stick to the cheap stuff. When they get into a confrontation and start throwing punches it looks like tall skinny guys waving their arms at each other.
They really shouldn't fight in the first place. However, if they choose to fight then don't embarass themselves. Have a real fight.
A recent case in Indy Racing League is a perfect example. I expect that as good young Canadian lads, both Alex Tagliani and Paul Tracy laced up skates at some point. They likely weren't in any hockey fights though. Paul Tracy pulled a bonehead move on the track recently and Alex took exception. They argued and ended up in a scuffle. It was horrible to watch. They ended up flailing at each other like girls (with apologies to girls who can actually fight). Two men doing the windmill at each other while wearing helmets is just embarassing.
Basketball players are horrible at it too. And they are the master of the cheap shot. They should, however,stick to the cheap stuff. When they get into a confrontation and start throwing punches it looks like tall skinny guys waving their arms at each other.
They really shouldn't fight in the first place. However, if they choose to fight then don't embarass themselves. Have a real fight.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Don't be late for the parole hearing - stupid people and guns.
A man in Toronto yesterday carjacked an SUV to drive to a parole hearing. Bright dude. He slashed a woman with some scissors, stole her SUV and then lost control on the highway while weaving in and out of traffic. After rolling several times he tried to carjack several other vehicles that stopped to help at the accident. How does a guy figure he can steal a vehicle after slashing the owner and drive three hours down the highway to his parole officers office without getting caught? Perhaps she knows the license plate? Perhaps he'll get pulled over weaving in and out of traffic? In a stolen SUV? The stupidity really boggles the mind.
On the same day that we hear about a man in Vermont who kills his ex-girlfriend and her mother before killing himself, can we see a bright side here? He used scissors instead of a gun. Stupid people with scissors are less likely to kill people than stupid people with handguns.
On the same day that we hear about a man in Vermont who kills his ex-girlfriend and her mother before killing himself, can we see a bright side here? He used scissors instead of a gun. Stupid people with scissors are less likely to kill people than stupid people with handguns.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Cycling and Doping (or is it dopes) - Requiem for Floyd Landis
Floyd, Floyd Floyd - we almost trusted you. You were different than all those HGH injecting, transfusion getting, drug popping cyclists. You were the nice little mennonite boy made good. Hard work and an honest life. You were the paragon of all that is good in the American dream. Now you're just Carl Lewis (insert any track athlete randomly here) with training wheels.
Now you're just another excuse making guy. I like the beer and liquor defence. It seems that drunks get horny so there must be an impact on testosterone. You should try Justin Gatlin's rogue masseur defence now that they have found that the testosterone was synethetic. Maybe the worm at the bottom of the tequila bottle was on the juice?
Maybe we should have two divisions in cycling - stock and modified??
Now you're just another excuse making guy. I like the beer and liquor defence. It seems that drunks get horny so there must be an impact on testosterone. You should try Justin Gatlin's rogue masseur defence now that they have found that the testosterone was synethetic. Maybe the worm at the bottom of the tequila bottle was on the juice?
Maybe we should have two divisions in cycling - stock and modified??
Hightened Security?????
The airports in the UK have been on hightened alert since the arrest of two dozen suspects in the liquid bombing case. I flew in Canada last week and there were no liquids and the standard scan of bags and check of my laptop (although they were most interested in the star wars fighter in my son's backpack). We all feel really good about flying because of the outstanding security staff. In reality, however, this low paying jobs are not attracting rocket scientists and we might be getting fooled by nice uniforms. Case in point.
A 12 year old boy in England ran away from a foster home and managed to get through security and onto a plane without a ticket, boarding pass or passport. This happened after the liquid bombing threat when security was supposed to be extra strict. They apparently caught him when someone else showed up and wanted into the seat that he was sitting in on the plane.
Keystone cops? Makes you wonder how smart the bad guys are.
A 12 year old boy in England ran away from a foster home and managed to get through security and onto a plane without a ticket, boarding pass or passport. This happened after the liquid bombing threat when security was supposed to be extra strict. They apparently caught him when someone else showed up and wanted into the seat that he was sitting in on the plane.
Keystone cops? Makes you wonder how smart the bad guys are.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
An anti-Rant - A Rave
I saw Lyle Lovett last night in Toronto. He played with his large band and it was amazing. The large band had musicians who could take your breath away and the performance was incredibly tight. He played for more than 2.5 hours straight. A++++++ rating.
There is still nothing like the Economist for a broad range of news and exceptional writing. This quote from this week's issue. The editorial was on the differences between men and women. It started with the context of the controversy around former Harvard President Larry Summers assertion that men are generally better at math than women. "But the long tail of mathematical genius does tend to be male, along with higher rates of idiocy and masturbation." Brilliant tongue in cheek writing and a sharp jab at political correctness. They go on to say:
"These differences may or may not be innate, but the arguement anyway misses the point. The interesting question is not whether men are more likely to be weirdly good at maths than women are, but whether the things that men are good at are more or less useful than the things that women are good at. The answer, in the rich world at least, is no."
Anyone who wants to know what's going on in the world all over should read the Economist.
There is still nothing like the Economist for a broad range of news and exceptional writing. This quote from this week's issue. The editorial was on the differences between men and women. It started with the context of the controversy around former Harvard President Larry Summers assertion that men are generally better at math than women. "But the long tail of mathematical genius does tend to be male, along with higher rates of idiocy and masturbation." Brilliant tongue in cheek writing and a sharp jab at political correctness. They go on to say:
"These differences may or may not be innate, but the arguement anyway misses the point. The interesting question is not whether men are more likely to be weirdly good at maths than women are, but whether the things that men are good at are more or less useful than the things that women are good at. The answer, in the rich world at least, is no."
Anyone who wants to know what's going on in the world all over should read the Economist.
Get these guys some PR
Sports Illustrated has a Pop Culture Grid every week in which they ask a group of professional athletes a number of questions to see how plugged in they are. It is clearly filler fluff but sometimes amusing. I usually read it at some point.
I've noticed a disturbing trend about baseball players though. A common question is what book they want to read or alternately, a recent book they enjoyed. THE MOST COMMON RESPONSE???:??? "I don't read books." I don't think I've seen any other athlete respond like that. And to be fair not all of the ball players do. BUT - please at least pretend to read. It makes us wonder about illiterate millionaires who do little but play playstation, inject performance enhancing drugs and diddle groupies (unless the aforementioned drugs have caused "shrinkage.)" That may be reality but its not a picture I expect you want us to have. Even Dr Suess's Go Dog Go would be a better response.
And its not limited to reading. Asked this weekwhich musician he'd like to be, Jason Marquis responded Billy Joel. Billy f.......n Joel?!?!! Maybe Barry Bonds wants to be Barry Manilow. Mark McGuire - Vanilla Ice??? C'mon please. Ian Kinsler, the Texas rookie, responded Justin Timberlake. Justin f.....n Timberlake?!?>! Ian - buddy - he's not a musician. He is one step up from Milli Vanilli in the musical food chain.
The Commissioners office should intervene and either screen responses or appoint responders. This has got to stop!
I've noticed a disturbing trend about baseball players though. A common question is what book they want to read or alternately, a recent book they enjoyed. THE MOST COMMON RESPONSE???:??? "I don't read books." I don't think I've seen any other athlete respond like that. And to be fair not all of the ball players do. BUT - please at least pretend to read. It makes us wonder about illiterate millionaires who do little but play playstation, inject performance enhancing drugs and diddle groupies (unless the aforementioned drugs have caused "shrinkage.)" That may be reality but its not a picture I expect you want us to have. Even Dr Suess's Go Dog Go would be a better response.
And its not limited to reading. Asked this weekwhich musician he'd like to be, Jason Marquis responded Billy Joel. Billy f.......n Joel?!?!! Maybe Barry Bonds wants to be Barry Manilow. Mark McGuire - Vanilla Ice??? C'mon please. Ian Kinsler, the Texas rookie, responded Justin Timberlake. Justin f.....n Timberlake?!?>! Ian - buddy - he's not a musician. He is one step up from Milli Vanilli in the musical food chain.
The Commissioners office should intervene and either screen responses or appoint responders. This has got to stop!
Thursday, August 03, 2006
The Passion Or Ego of Mel
I'm not sure whether celebrities really believe they are above the law or that they are just too drunk/stoned/stupid to know better. It probably depends on the specific case.
Mel gets pissed - he clearly has a problem but one can't help but wonder if the rehab thing is damage control - and riffs on a deputy about the evils of Jews. I don't happen to be a proponent of all the global jewish conspiracy bunk, but even a proponent would have to struggle to make the connection to getting pulled over for eratic driving on the Malibu freeway. You're pissed. Your famous and your driving. Shut up and take your lumps. Don't be an idiot.
Mel gets pissed - he clearly has a problem but one can't help but wonder if the rehab thing is damage control - and riffs on a deputy about the evils of Jews. I don't happen to be a proponent of all the global jewish conspiracy bunk, but even a proponent would have to struggle to make the connection to getting pulled over for eratic driving on the Malibu freeway. You're pissed. Your famous and your driving. Shut up and take your lumps. Don't be an idiot.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
The real reason bars hate non-smoking rules
The latest breakthrough in the world of science is stunning. Apparently smoking helps increase a person's capacity for booze. This provoked a couple of random thoughts:
1) Why is this research happening? Who is funding it? Is this really pushing back the frontiers of science?
2) How do I become a subject in this research? Is pot the same as tobacco? Cigars as good as cigarettes?
2) Should I be smoking at the bar so I can have an extra beer before driving home?
3) Is this why bars don't want to embrace no smoking rules? I have to admit that I enjoy the cleaner air in bars. I used to smoke and not - coincentally I now discover - could drink more. Perhaps I should start again. Maybe the second hand smoke was enough to provide me with inebriation immunity.
1) Why is this research happening? Who is funding it? Is this really pushing back the frontiers of science?
2) How do I become a subject in this research? Is pot the same as tobacco? Cigars as good as cigarettes?
2) Should I be smoking at the bar so I can have an extra beer before driving home?
3) Is this why bars don't want to embrace no smoking rules? I have to admit that I enjoy the cleaner air in bars. I used to smoke and not - coincentally I now discover - could drink more. Perhaps I should start again. Maybe the second hand smoke was enough to provide me with inebriation immunity.
Guns don't kill people - idiots with guns kill people
Alarming news from Indiana this week. A teenager has been charged with taking pot shots at trucks from several highway overpasses. The NRA might argue harmless teenage prank but a man was killed - completely randomly. The allegation is that this youth was out on a wholesome family activity - shooting and gutting deer - when he got angry and left. While others might just spin their tires and take off; maybe even hit a mailbox or two, this 17 year old had a gun and decided to release stress by shooting at vehicles on the interstate. Should a 17 year old - whether angry or not - be driving around with a gun? Probably not. He can't vote. He can't join the army. But he can carry a weapon. How does this make sense??
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Great Expectations from Lebanon
The escalating conflict in the Middle East is horrible. Everyone involved seems to ignore the rational and fuel the ongoing downward spiral. I don't pretend to understand it and will leave allocating blame to someone else. There is more than enough blame to go around.
I am amazed at the coordination effort that governments are putting together to get citizens out of Lebanon. I am, however, more amazed at the criticism that many people in Lebanon are levelling at Governments who are "not moving fast enough."
I remember when Canadians were trapped in Cancun during a Hurricaine and bemoaned the delay and cost in the Canadian government getting them home. I wondered then why it was the Canadian taxpayer's responsibility to get someone who got a good deal in hurricaine season to go sit on the beach and then are surprised when a hurricaine hits. Sure its nice to help but why bitch if it isn't fast enough. It was their choice and they should have understood the risk. The "safety net" shouldn't extend to hotels in Cancun.
It gets a bit more tricky in the war zone but conceptually its still the same. Face it, while Lebanon has been significantly more stable recently, it is still a higher risk spot. If you're a Canadian citizen who takes a holiday (whether six months or two weeks) in Lebanon and you get caught in a firefight, do you really have the right to bitch if it takes an extra day or two to get you out? Villages in southern Lebanon were acknowledged to be under Hezbollah control. Hezbollah launched an action and Israel responed. Clearly now an unpleasant place to be but these Canadian (and American )citizens went there by choice. Complaining the the government is taking too long to get them out seems a bit unreasonable. Appreciate the help and shut your gob. You chose to go there. The risk of bombing was higher there than heading to Sauble Beach for a couple of weeks of camping. I appreciate that many of these folks have been separated from family and want to go visit. I also appreciate that this is a remarkably dangerous and frightening situation. However, Canadian and American governments have not "abandonned" these folks in Lebanon. They went to Lebanon by choice and our governments are doing their best to help. This rescue is not an inalienable right of citizenship.
I am amazed at the coordination effort that governments are putting together to get citizens out of Lebanon. I am, however, more amazed at the criticism that many people in Lebanon are levelling at Governments who are "not moving fast enough."
I remember when Canadians were trapped in Cancun during a Hurricaine and bemoaned the delay and cost in the Canadian government getting them home. I wondered then why it was the Canadian taxpayer's responsibility to get someone who got a good deal in hurricaine season to go sit on the beach and then are surprised when a hurricaine hits. Sure its nice to help but why bitch if it isn't fast enough. It was their choice and they should have understood the risk. The "safety net" shouldn't extend to hotels in Cancun.
It gets a bit more tricky in the war zone but conceptually its still the same. Face it, while Lebanon has been significantly more stable recently, it is still a higher risk spot. If you're a Canadian citizen who takes a holiday (whether six months or two weeks) in Lebanon and you get caught in a firefight, do you really have the right to bitch if it takes an extra day or two to get you out? Villages in southern Lebanon were acknowledged to be under Hezbollah control. Hezbollah launched an action and Israel responed. Clearly now an unpleasant place to be but these Canadian (and American )citizens went there by choice. Complaining the the government is taking too long to get them out seems a bit unreasonable. Appreciate the help and shut your gob. You chose to go there. The risk of bombing was higher there than heading to Sauble Beach for a couple of weeks of camping. I appreciate that many of these folks have been separated from family and want to go visit. I also appreciate that this is a remarkably dangerous and frightening situation. However, Canadian and American governments have not "abandonned" these folks in Lebanon. They went to Lebanon by choice and our governments are doing their best to help. This rescue is not an inalienable right of citizenship.
Snowed off the Island
So Neil Smith got his dream job back and was an NHL GM. It lasted about six weeks and the Islanders owner Charles Wang fired him because he didn't like the new structure - everyone reports to the owner rather than the GM. This is starting to look like a CFL Glieberman circus. And it gets better.
Mr Wang, who stuck with Mad Mike Milbury for ever, then hired his backup goaltender as general manager. I promised not to tell but he interviewed me and I would have gotten the job if my fantasy hockey team had performed a bit better last year. Garth Snow, the new GM has a steep learning curve ahead of him. He has to find a way to dump his own salary which will count against the cap for the next two years and to hire his own goaltending replacement.
Pat Lafontaine who had come on as a special assistant to someone or other then decided to bail out before it got too crazy.
Apparently there is a fair bit of luck in getting filthy rich because Mr Wang does not appear to have a clue what a laughing stock he is.
Mr Wang, who stuck with Mad Mike Milbury for ever, then hired his backup goaltender as general manager. I promised not to tell but he interviewed me and I would have gotten the job if my fantasy hockey team had performed a bit better last year. Garth Snow, the new GM has a steep learning curve ahead of him. He has to find a way to dump his own salary which will count against the cap for the next two years and to hire his own goaltending replacement.
Pat Lafontaine who had come on as a special assistant to someone or other then decided to bail out before it got too crazy.
Apparently there is a fair bit of luck in getting filthy rich because Mr Wang does not appear to have a clue what a laughing stock he is.
Monday, June 26, 2006
Boy George - You might be an idiot if . . . .
With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy and his redneck rants.
Boy George has gotten himself into trouble. And will I think that might just be karma karma karma(silly and gratuitous 80's music reference - my apologies), it really seems like this is self inflicted.
First, he falsely reports a burglary. That's dumb by itself but is especially so if you have 13 bags of cocaine in your apartment. Soooo, he pleads guilty to the false reporting charge and goes to rehab and that's that? Noooo. He decides that the community service he is sentenced to is too demeaning for him so refuses. He was assigned to rake leaves in a park. He claims that it is humiliating for him and that it would be a circus if Boy George was raking leaves. Apparently he is also delusional. He is now simply an overweight bald englishman living in New York (and apparently putting all of his residuals up his nose). Boy (or should I say George) get over yourself. We're all over the Culture Club. I don't really want to hurt you. I don't really want to make you cry. BUT get a grip.
The judge apparently sees it my way and says he's like any other offender and will rake leaves or go to jail. Cruel and unusual punishment? I think not. He might be an idiot.
Boy George has gotten himself into trouble. And will I think that might just be karma karma karma(silly and gratuitous 80's music reference - my apologies), it really seems like this is self inflicted.
First, he falsely reports a burglary. That's dumb by itself but is especially so if you have 13 bags of cocaine in your apartment. Soooo, he pleads guilty to the false reporting charge and goes to rehab and that's that? Noooo. He decides that the community service he is sentenced to is too demeaning for him so refuses. He was assigned to rake leaves in a park. He claims that it is humiliating for him and that it would be a circus if Boy George was raking leaves. Apparently he is also delusional. He is now simply an overweight bald englishman living in New York (and apparently putting all of his residuals up his nose). Boy (or should I say George) get over yourself. We're all over the Culture Club. I don't really want to hurt you. I don't really want to make you cry. BUT get a grip.
The judge apparently sees it my way and says he's like any other offender and will rake leaves or go to jail. Cruel and unusual punishment? I think not. He might be an idiot.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Misguided Canadian Angst
There was much handwringing and pontificating during the NHL playoffs that a Canadian team had not won the Stanly Cup in many years. It is only fitting, went the logic, that Hockey's Holy Grail be returned to the cradle of the game. What a load of crap.
Hockey is a global game played at the highest level in a North American market. We should appreciate the game. Clearly fans of Edmonton wanted thier team to win but why did all of Canada get choked up about the Oilers - a team generally almost as reviled as the Leafs outside of the core Edmonton market due to the obnoxious city of champions fans (one of whom I had as a long time room mate). It is hardly a matter of nationalism. The MVP goalie on Carolina was from Edmonton whereas Edmonton's goalie was from Finland. Carolina's young star is Canadian Eric Staal. Edmonton has a lot of Canadians too. The point though is that the location of the winner really isn't that important. Is it?
Hockey is a global game played at the highest level in a North American market. We should appreciate the game. Clearly fans of Edmonton wanted thier team to win but why did all of Canada get choked up about the Oilers - a team generally almost as reviled as the Leafs outside of the core Edmonton market due to the obnoxious city of champions fans (one of whom I had as a long time room mate). It is hardly a matter of nationalism. The MVP goalie on Carolina was from Edmonton whereas Edmonton's goalie was from Finland. Carolina's young star is Canadian Eric Staal. Edmonton has a lot of Canadians too. The point though is that the location of the winner really isn't that important. Is it?
Saving the Hungarian Whales
You may have seen the news recently that the Internation Whaling Commission voted to restore commercial whaling. This vote was merely a policy vote. In order to get rid of the moratorium on commercial whaling 75% of the members of the commission need to vote for the end and there are not yet sufficient votes.
There may ore may not be an ecological argument for the resumption of the commercial whaling. I will leave that to the experts. BUT, I read with interest the composition of the modern Internation Whaling Commission. While the commission started with the seven major whaling nations, it now has more members. St Kitts, Kiribati and the Marshall Islands are on the water but have never had any commercial whaling. Mongolia, Mali and Hungary are landlocked and obviously have never had commercial whaling fleets. Why then, would these countries be on the commission and voting to restart commercial whaling. Perhaps because whaling proponent and original member Japan paid their member ship dues? Perhaps because Japan is a major supplier of aid? Might I be too cynical?
This sort of obvious stacking of panels happens all the time in internaitonal commissions and organizations. Just take a look at the Human Rights Organization for the United Nations. It politicizes the process and makes a mockery of good decision making. Why even bother having the Commission if we undermine the process and buy votes to change policy. It may be right to change the policy but if its all just a game why bother. We're not buying the crap anyway! Well maybe we are because most of the media didn't report Hungary's desire to restart commercial whaling.
There may ore may not be an ecological argument for the resumption of the commercial whaling. I will leave that to the experts. BUT, I read with interest the composition of the modern Internation Whaling Commission. While the commission started with the seven major whaling nations, it now has more members. St Kitts, Kiribati and the Marshall Islands are on the water but have never had any commercial whaling. Mongolia, Mali and Hungary are landlocked and obviously have never had commercial whaling fleets. Why then, would these countries be on the commission and voting to restart commercial whaling. Perhaps because whaling proponent and original member Japan paid their member ship dues? Perhaps because Japan is a major supplier of aid? Might I be too cynical?
This sort of obvious stacking of panels happens all the time in internaitonal commissions and organizations. Just take a look at the Human Rights Organization for the United Nations. It politicizes the process and makes a mockery of good decision making. Why even bother having the Commission if we undermine the process and buy votes to change policy. It may be right to change the policy but if its all just a game why bother. We're not buying the crap anyway! Well maybe we are because most of the media didn't report Hungary's desire to restart commercial whaling.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Em-bare-assed or another reason for gun control?
The story goes something like this. Man asks woman to marry him. She is wavering. Loves him but not sure they are ready. In an effort to convince her he strips naked and jumps out of her second story window. We will leave for now the rationale as to why he would think that might work and continue the story.
He is out running across the street and sees a couple coming. He then hides under a bush. Another man seeing the bush moving and bare feet underneath pulls out a pistol and tells the guy to come out. Pistol man is not a policeman but pistol packing citizen joe. Naked man runs away - clearly rethinking the whole thing about convincing his girlfriend to marry him. Pistol packing Joe gives chase and opens fire. We will also not delve into the rationale of shooting at naked running men. Sure you might be offended but let's keep some perspective here. Naked man not hit but falls and hurts himself. Pistol packing citizen is charged with a number of offences - while in Michigan it is legal to carry a gun it is still illegal to shoot at naked guys who are running away. Naked guy not charged. No word on engagement.
Open questions.
Why get naked and run across the road to convince someone to get married?
Why shoot at (obviously) unarmed naked fleeing man?
Should everyone really be allowed to carry pistols? Guns don't kill naked streakers. Trigger happy pistol packing citizens at least try to.
He is out running across the street and sees a couple coming. He then hides under a bush. Another man seeing the bush moving and bare feet underneath pulls out a pistol and tells the guy to come out. Pistol man is not a policeman but pistol packing citizen joe. Naked man runs away - clearly rethinking the whole thing about convincing his girlfriend to marry him. Pistol packing Joe gives chase and opens fire. We will also not delve into the rationale of shooting at naked running men. Sure you might be offended but let's keep some perspective here. Naked man not hit but falls and hurts himself. Pistol packing citizen is charged with a number of offences - while in Michigan it is legal to carry a gun it is still illegal to shoot at naked guys who are running away. Naked guy not charged. No word on engagement.
Open questions.
Why get naked and run across the road to convince someone to get married?
Why shoot at (obviously) unarmed naked fleeing man?
Should everyone really be allowed to carry pistols? Guns don't kill naked streakers. Trigger happy pistol packing citizens at least try to.
The fat lady has sung
Well Toronto's new Opera House opened last night with a grand reception and celebration. The cultural mucky muck's had decried the lack of an opera house for years and the various levels of government ponied up cash to get it built. I don't pretend to know the finer points of the acoustic requirements of an opera house but this just seems like a big boondoggle to me.
Opera isn't that popular. Why do we need a dedicated opera house? We don't but he cultural elite loves opera and wants a place to see it. They also have cash which they donate to politicians and generate a very nice return on when they get an opera house in return. Very nice.
The cultural imperialists also would have you believe that you can't be a world class city without an Opera House. It represents one of the pinnacles of sophisticated culture. If the Horseshoe tavern wanted some cash to upgrade the facilities they would be laughed out of town. Some of the greatest up and coming bands play there and it should be a Toronto cultural icon but it is not. Doesn't differ that much from an opera house. You can have drinks before and after music. No tux's at the horseshoe thought.
I personally don't feel any better about the opera house and wrote my MLA and MP to tell them. I'm sure I will be scorned as a cultural simpleton without enough sense (read cash) to know what good culture is.
Opera isn't that popular. Why do we need a dedicated opera house? We don't but he cultural elite loves opera and wants a place to see it. They also have cash which they donate to politicians and generate a very nice return on when they get an opera house in return. Very nice.
The cultural imperialists also would have you believe that you can't be a world class city without an Opera House. It represents one of the pinnacles of sophisticated culture. If the Horseshoe tavern wanted some cash to upgrade the facilities they would be laughed out of town. Some of the greatest up and coming bands play there and it should be a Toronto cultural icon but it is not. Doesn't differ that much from an opera house. You can have drinks before and after music. No tux's at the horseshoe thought.
I personally don't feel any better about the opera house and wrote my MLA and MP to tell them. I'm sure I will be scorned as a cultural simpleton without enough sense (read cash) to know what good culture is.
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
A real sense of context
There is a vote today in the US Senate on a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage. I oppose such a constitutional amendment but I suppose they have every right to bring it to a vote. It seems a colossal waste of time - especially when the people proposing it admit they have little chance of it passing. A purely pandering election year ploy.
A couple of points.
Republican Senator in a fit of hyperbole said "I don't believe there is any issue more important than this one." WHAT. I want to be clear. There is a war in Iraq. There are trillions in deficit. The US dollar is weak and the trade deficit is growing. Parts of Louisiana are sinking into the Gulf of Mexico. High fuel prices are slowing the economy. Pictures of Brad and Angelina's baby have been leaked and prohibiting gay marriage is the most important issue around???? Come on. Even Pat Robertson wouldn't be so stupid as to say that.
This whole thing is something I don't understand anyway. How is anyone else's relationship threatened by allowing two gays to marry. If two loving adults want to make a commitment let them. How is that making more of a mockery of the tradition of marriage than seeing these freaky Michael Jackson/Lisa Marie Presley 30 second marriages. Liz Taylor's 243 marriages are OK but others aren't? A quickie annulment but well connected and wealthy Catholics is perfectly OK but two gays in along term commited relationship is an abomination? Seeing the huge money these churhes spend on fancy churches and political action to fight issues like this is an abomination to me but I recognize thier right to do it. And they would denounce me if I tried to curb it. Why do they have to limit others rights because it makes them feel icky? No one is saying thier church has to marry gays. Just let them get married as they want to. It is ludicrous.
A couple of points.
Republican Senator in a fit of hyperbole said "I don't believe there is any issue more important than this one." WHAT. I want to be clear. There is a war in Iraq. There are trillions in deficit. The US dollar is weak and the trade deficit is growing. Parts of Louisiana are sinking into the Gulf of Mexico. High fuel prices are slowing the economy. Pictures of Brad and Angelina's baby have been leaked and prohibiting gay marriage is the most important issue around???? Come on. Even Pat Robertson wouldn't be so stupid as to say that.
This whole thing is something I don't understand anyway. How is anyone else's relationship threatened by allowing two gays to marry. If two loving adults want to make a commitment let them. How is that making more of a mockery of the tradition of marriage than seeing these freaky Michael Jackson/Lisa Marie Presley 30 second marriages. Liz Taylor's 243 marriages are OK but others aren't? A quickie annulment but well connected and wealthy Catholics is perfectly OK but two gays in along term commited relationship is an abomination? Seeing the huge money these churhes spend on fancy churches and political action to fight issues like this is an abomination to me but I recognize thier right to do it. And they would denounce me if I tried to curb it. Why do they have to limit others rights because it makes them feel icky? No one is saying thier church has to marry gays. Just let them get married as they want to. It is ludicrous.
apologies
sorry folks. I've been distracted and have been delinquent in posting. not without rants but rather without time. will promise to do better.
rantman.
rantman.
Monday, May 15, 2006
Why the "Traditional Media" are better than Bloggers
We all know that bloggers are far less careful and credible than the traditional media. The key is to identify some key factors that differentiate bloggers from the more credible mainstream.
1) Resources to be sure they minimize mistakes.
Larger mainstream media outlets have the time and staff to be sure they get it right. They are not easily fooled and are diligent to make sure they get it right. The less mainstream like For Rant and the BBC are more likely to get it wrong. For example, the BBC interviewed a London cabbie they mistook for an on-line music expert to get his opinion of the recent Apple vs the Beatles court case that the Apple Computer Corp won. While the actual expert was sitting in a waiting room (surreally) watching himself give a whacky cabbie opinion on the court case the interviewer proceeded obliviously. The cabbie realized the mistake and after some initial consternation proceeded gamely.
2) Better access to facts.
While bloggers like the For Rant and CBC Newsworld must troll the internet and other sources for info - walking the tightrope of accuracy - large mainstream media outlets have access to a myriad of in depth sources. On the other hand, for example, CBC Newsworld has to quote things like Wikipedia frequently which occassionally includes inaccuracies. That's how they add real value to the Canadian viewing public. You wouldn't see someone more credible like Jon Stewart's Daily Show have to stoop as low as CBCNewsworld.
1) Resources to be sure they minimize mistakes.
Larger mainstream media outlets have the time and staff to be sure they get it right. They are not easily fooled and are diligent to make sure they get it right. The less mainstream like For Rant and the BBC are more likely to get it wrong. For example, the BBC interviewed a London cabbie they mistook for an on-line music expert to get his opinion of the recent Apple vs the Beatles court case that the Apple Computer Corp won. While the actual expert was sitting in a waiting room (surreally) watching himself give a whacky cabbie opinion on the court case the interviewer proceeded obliviously. The cabbie realized the mistake and after some initial consternation proceeded gamely.
2) Better access to facts.
While bloggers like the For Rant and CBC Newsworld must troll the internet and other sources for info - walking the tightrope of accuracy - large mainstream media outlets have access to a myriad of in depth sources. On the other hand, for example, CBC Newsworld has to quote things like Wikipedia frequently which occassionally includes inaccuracies. That's how they add real value to the Canadian viewing public. You wouldn't see someone more credible like Jon Stewart's Daily Show have to stoop as low as CBCNewsworld.
not just fat tuesday
I recently returned from a trip to Florida and Walt Disney World. It struck me how fat visitors to Disney are. I wondered if it was Americans or just Disney visitors who are fat - and not just a little. Its criminal to see all these fat kids will rolls all over the place. The number of waddling adults was alarming too. It would simply be gratuitous to make fat jokes now and I will attempt to resist the urge. I am rarely accused of being extremely aware of my surroundings so the fat must really have been profound.
It is hardly surprising. It was almost impossible to get vegetables at a restaurant in Disney World. We bought fruit in our hotel as a snack despite being assured that "you don't have to buy fruit with your meal plan you know. You can buy chips or cookies if you want." Yes we wouldn't want to be short changed and be forced to buy an orange, apple or banana when a cream filled twinkie is available.
I wondered for a while about whether this was a general trend in America or specific to Disney when I read about a new piece of research in the US. 65% of Americans are overweight and 34% are obese. THATS ONE THIRD! I probably underestimated the obesity - after all you need to walk around those parks (although it was also noticable how many of those power scooters there were rented out).
For God's sake eat some fruit and vegetables and get a bit more exercise.
It is hardly surprising. It was almost impossible to get vegetables at a restaurant in Disney World. We bought fruit in our hotel as a snack despite being assured that "you don't have to buy fruit with your meal plan you know. You can buy chips or cookies if you want." Yes we wouldn't want to be short changed and be forced to buy an orange, apple or banana when a cream filled twinkie is available.
I wondered for a while about whether this was a general trend in America or specific to Disney when I read about a new piece of research in the US. 65% of Americans are overweight and 34% are obese. THATS ONE THIRD! I probably underestimated the obesity - after all you need to walk around those parks (although it was also noticable how many of those power scooters there were rented out).
For God's sake eat some fruit and vegetables and get a bit more exercise.
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Bad Judgement in the Age of the Internet - II
As was the case previously, here are some cautionary tales regarding questionable behaviour and modern technoloby.
The first one is somewhat sad. A freshman at a University in Wisconsin made a series of explicitly pornographic videos with her webcam. The involved stripping and her using some sex toys. She sent them to her boyfriend who was at another university. What happened next is the subject of some speculation on the web.
Either: 1) they broke up and her ex purposely let these video files circulate on the web or 2) he incorrectly filed them on his hard drive and they ended up being picked up as he participated in an online file sharing site. Either way, this poor woman's porn ended up all over the internet. Legend has it that the boyfriend was sent to jail for a year but this is tough to verify. She has gone underground and the videos continue to circulate. Clearly a bad idea on her part but exacerbated by the ease and speed with which digital media can circulate. She's right there next to the stripper from Western on drunkuniversity.com and numerous other sites.
The second one is more sinister. We continue to hear news of child predators trying to lure kids over the Internet. It is a sad irony that someone from the US Department of Homeland Security was caught trying to lure a young girl for sex. Its bad enough that these guys do it but they have to start seeing a trend in these guys getting caught???
The third is more of a success story. Two university students in China used thier webcam to lip sync to Backstreet Boys and circulated it. The "Back Dorm Boys" got famous and are now making money like crazy. They will be used in Pepsi commercials across China. Rather than turning into the light sabre kid from Quebec ( a sad story) these guys got famous and made money. The bad judgement - The Backstreet Boys?????? There is a video around somewhere in my basement of several students with too much to drink doing a Def Leppard video. Fortunately it is analog on tape and will never see the world wide web. Life has changed. Making bad choices is one thing but they can get away from you in the digital age.
The first one is somewhat sad. A freshman at a University in Wisconsin made a series of explicitly pornographic videos with her webcam. The involved stripping and her using some sex toys. She sent them to her boyfriend who was at another university. What happened next is the subject of some speculation on the web.
Either: 1) they broke up and her ex purposely let these video files circulate on the web or 2) he incorrectly filed them on his hard drive and they ended up being picked up as he participated in an online file sharing site. Either way, this poor woman's porn ended up all over the internet. Legend has it that the boyfriend was sent to jail for a year but this is tough to verify. She has gone underground and the videos continue to circulate. Clearly a bad idea on her part but exacerbated by the ease and speed with which digital media can circulate. She's right there next to the stripper from Western on drunkuniversity.com and numerous other sites.
The second one is more sinister. We continue to hear news of child predators trying to lure kids over the Internet. It is a sad irony that someone from the US Department of Homeland Security was caught trying to lure a young girl for sex. Its bad enough that these guys do it but they have to start seeing a trend in these guys getting caught???
The third is more of a success story. Two university students in China used thier webcam to lip sync to Backstreet Boys and circulated it. The "Back Dorm Boys" got famous and are now making money like crazy. They will be used in Pepsi commercials across China. Rather than turning into the light sabre kid from Quebec ( a sad story) these guys got famous and made money. The bad judgement - The Backstreet Boys?????? There is a video around somewhere in my basement of several students with too much to drink doing a Def Leppard video. Fortunately it is analog on tape and will never see the world wide web. Life has changed. Making bad choices is one thing but they can get away from you in the digital age.
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Democracy: A Primer - 1
We hear a lot of talk going around about spreading democracy around the world - a noble objective. There is, however, a certain lack of clarity around the meaning of democracy and the specifics of implementation. Here for clarification are a couple of examples of initiatives and where they fall in the Bush Doctrine definition of Democracy.
Bad - the recent elections in Belorus (a former member of the USSR) was condemned by all right thinking democrats and all Republicans period. There was widespread evidence of election fixing and fraud. This is clearly unacceptable and there were murmurings of disapproval from Washington. Subsequent protests were watched by police and eventually broken up.
Okay - in the State of Texas, Republicans moved electoral boundaries around to ensure more Republicans get elected and re-elected. In Illinois it is my understanding that some districts aren't even contiguous (or are marginally so) in order to sufficiently gerrymander the districts to ensure incumbents are rarely defeated.
The difference - apparently if you only hijack individual elections you are making a mockery of democracy. If you create laws that essentially hijack every election you are paragon of democray. I have that on good authority - Tom DeLay.
More to come.
Bad - the recent elections in Belorus (a former member of the USSR) was condemned by all right thinking democrats and all Republicans period. There was widespread evidence of election fixing and fraud. This is clearly unacceptable and there were murmurings of disapproval from Washington. Subsequent protests were watched by police and eventually broken up.
Okay - in the State of Texas, Republicans moved electoral boundaries around to ensure more Republicans get elected and re-elected. In Illinois it is my understanding that some districts aren't even contiguous (or are marginally so) in order to sufficiently gerrymander the districts to ensure incumbents are rarely defeated.
The difference - apparently if you only hijack individual elections you are making a mockery of democracy. If you create laws that essentially hijack every election you are paragon of democray. I have that on good authority - Tom DeLay.
More to come.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Bribing Nigerian Referees
I think I will go ref Nigerian soccer. The head of the soccer federation in Nigeria said that corruption is rampant. He has told referees that they may continue to take bribes (a guy has got to make a living) but to not change the outcome of games. Isn't that beautiful. Take bribes from bad people and screw them by not changing the outcome. A simple way to improve the honesty in the game and improve the perception of the integrity of the game.
Perhaps the ref's should walk around the field before the game and fans can slip bills into their jock strap while they wave a yellow card seductively. This is one of the dumbest things I've heard yet.
Perhaps the ref's should walk around the field before the game and fans can slip bills into their jock strap while they wave a yellow card seductively. This is one of the dumbest things I've heard yet.
The two faces of Stephen Harper - part B
Oh Steve, we wanted to believe you. You were going to be different - honest - transparent. But alas, you are in the end just another politician.
1) Government was going to be more open and honest. Accountability is a key word. Now the Conservatives are limiting access to Cabinet Ministers and making it harder for the press to report on what the government is doing. Don't worry says Mr Harper. We're honest and we'll tell you what we want to tell you. But you see Steve, we no longer trust you. We might not like the press any more than you do, but believe it or not we now trust them even more than we do you. Even CBC and the Toronto Star. That must hurt but its true.
2) Government was going to work differently. Lobbying by political assistants was simply not going to happen any more. Now two former Conservative assitants, whose bosses are now ministers, have started thier own lobbying firm and are signing up clients who are beating a path to thier door. But!, rationalizes Stevie Wonder (blind to the irony), they were not ministerial assistants and so this is cool. Deposed Liberals can't lobby but good hardworking formerly opposition honest assistants need to make a living and should be allowed to lobby thier now powerful former bosses. Yup, things are different now. The pigs at the trough are now Conservatives rather than Liberals. Apparently we misunderstood.
3) A Conservative MP recently proposed jailing journalists that reported inaccurately. I expect he had a fantasy of strapping certain editorial writers to the rack. He retracted (apparently that's one of the charges that Saddam is up on). Perhaps we should jail stupid and dishonest politicians?? That would take up a fair bit of the additional prison space that the Conservatives are planning to build.
1) Government was going to be more open and honest. Accountability is a key word. Now the Conservatives are limiting access to Cabinet Ministers and making it harder for the press to report on what the government is doing. Don't worry says Mr Harper. We're honest and we'll tell you what we want to tell you. But you see Steve, we no longer trust you. We might not like the press any more than you do, but believe it or not we now trust them even more than we do you. Even CBC and the Toronto Star. That must hurt but its true.
2) Government was going to work differently. Lobbying by political assistants was simply not going to happen any more. Now two former Conservative assitants, whose bosses are now ministers, have started thier own lobbying firm and are signing up clients who are beating a path to thier door. But!, rationalizes Stevie Wonder (blind to the irony), they were not ministerial assistants and so this is cool. Deposed Liberals can't lobby but good hardworking formerly opposition honest assistants need to make a living and should be allowed to lobby thier now powerful former bosses. Yup, things are different now. The pigs at the trough are now Conservatives rather than Liberals. Apparently we misunderstood.
3) A Conservative MP recently proposed jailing journalists that reported inaccurately. I expect he had a fantasy of strapping certain editorial writers to the rack. He retracted (apparently that's one of the charges that Saddam is up on). Perhaps we should jail stupid and dishonest politicians?? That would take up a fair bit of the additional prison space that the Conservatives are planning to build.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Standing up for your lawn
As an avowed right winger and non-interventionist, I've always wrestled with the issue of gun control. I am inclined to have some sorts of controls on weapons and bans on other weapons. I find it hard to believe that owning an automatic rifle is critical for hunting. I also find the argument that "guns don't kill people - people kill people," a bit wanting. Guns make it easier for people to kill people. If you get angry and a gun is handy bad things are more likely to occur.
For example, a man in Ohio shot a 15 year old neighbor for walking on his immaculately groomed lawn. It was a shotgun and not a semi automatic weapon but I don't think the founding fathers were thinking about a suburban lawn when they included the right to bear arms to protect your turf. Whatever happened to the grumpy old neighbor who shook his rake at kids cutting the corner and walking on the lawn? Holy crap, I'm glad that Mr (anonymous) didn't have a shotgun when I lit that bag of poop on his front porch on fire when I was twelve.
This is simply ridiculous.
For example, a man in Ohio shot a 15 year old neighbor for walking on his immaculately groomed lawn. It was a shotgun and not a semi automatic weapon but I don't think the founding fathers were thinking about a suburban lawn when they included the right to bear arms to protect your turf. Whatever happened to the grumpy old neighbor who shook his rake at kids cutting the corner and walking on the lawn? Holy crap, I'm glad that Mr (anonymous) didn't have a shotgun when I lit that bag of poop on his front porch on fire when I was twelve.
This is simply ridiculous.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
No brain no gain
It seems that people continue to try to get ahead using short cuts but they just don't use their brains. One of these is a bit funny and the other simply sad.
1) A thief in Toronto broke into an SUV and stole a stereo. He then attempted to sell it to the owner of the same SUV. It is not clear from the report that he knew it was the same man (which would have made this especially brazen) but one would think that you might be better off moving to another neighborhood before trying to sell something you've just stolen. The victim chased the man down the street until police caught up to them and arrested the thief.
2) We've all heard about the lengths that hockey parents will go. We recall the Texas cheerleader's Mom who tried to arrange for the murder of a competitor. Recently in France, a father was found guilty of manslaughter, after a tennis opponent of his son died in a car crash. It seems the man had been putting a powerful antidepressant in the water bottles of his son and daugter's opponents. The drug causes drowsiness. The man who died withdrew from the match and attempted to drive home and was killed in crash. You wonder what people are thinking in these circumstances. How do you get satisfaction out of having your kids beat sedated opponents? How do you think you won't get caught? Why is it that important?
Strange days indeed.
1) A thief in Toronto broke into an SUV and stole a stereo. He then attempted to sell it to the owner of the same SUV. It is not clear from the report that he knew it was the same man (which would have made this especially brazen) but one would think that you might be better off moving to another neighborhood before trying to sell something you've just stolen. The victim chased the man down the street until police caught up to them and arrested the thief.
2) We've all heard about the lengths that hockey parents will go. We recall the Texas cheerleader's Mom who tried to arrange for the murder of a competitor. Recently in France, a father was found guilty of manslaughter, after a tennis opponent of his son died in a car crash. It seems the man had been putting a powerful antidepressant in the water bottles of his son and daugter's opponents. The drug causes drowsiness. The man who died withdrew from the match and attempted to drive home and was killed in crash. You wonder what people are thinking in these circumstances. How do you get satisfaction out of having your kids beat sedated opponents? How do you think you won't get caught? Why is it that important?
Strange days indeed.
Friday, March 10, 2006
The two faces of Stephen Harper
I think Stephen Harper has the right to appoint whomever he wants to his cabinet. He must understandably be a bit more careful as leader of a minority government but the membership is his perogative.
At the same time, however, the ethics czar (an admitedly Liberal appointee) has the right to look at the appointment of David Emerson. It seems a bit silly to look at this but he has the right to (and probably the responsibility if MP's complain).
I frankly don't understand the uproar about Mr Emerson but I am likely a good deal more cynical about politicians and their motives than most. Of course he crossed the floor because he could be in cabinet. It may be that he thought he could serve the interests of his constituents and the province of British Columbia. It is more likely (in my estimation) that he wanted to stay in cabinet and this gave him the opportunity. Its about the political game more than idealism.
What I think is really telling is that as shrill as Mr Harper was in opposition about ethics and the appearance of propriety, he is refusing to cooperate with Mr Shapiro. This sort of moral superiority (I can do what I want and trust me that its right) is just what makes Canadians cynical about politicians. He promised to be different. He promised to be transparent. It took him about 48 hours to show that he's just like all the others. He's the p'tit gars from Calgary.
Mr Harper - we believed you when you said it would be different. What we expected was that you would prove it. You assumed it was proven and then said "Trust me." Its clearly just more of the same.
At the same time, however, the ethics czar (an admitedly Liberal appointee) has the right to look at the appointment of David Emerson. It seems a bit silly to look at this but he has the right to (and probably the responsibility if MP's complain).
I frankly don't understand the uproar about Mr Emerson but I am likely a good deal more cynical about politicians and their motives than most. Of course he crossed the floor because he could be in cabinet. It may be that he thought he could serve the interests of his constituents and the province of British Columbia. It is more likely (in my estimation) that he wanted to stay in cabinet and this gave him the opportunity. Its about the political game more than idealism.
What I think is really telling is that as shrill as Mr Harper was in opposition about ethics and the appearance of propriety, he is refusing to cooperate with Mr Shapiro. This sort of moral superiority (I can do what I want and trust me that its right) is just what makes Canadians cynical about politicians. He promised to be different. He promised to be transparent. It took him about 48 hours to show that he's just like all the others. He's the p'tit gars from Calgary.
Mr Harper - we believed you when you said it would be different. What we expected was that you would prove it. You assumed it was proven and then said "Trust me." Its clearly just more of the same.
You can't make stuff like this up!
Some people just don't seem to get it.
Recently in Pittsburg a man walked up to the counter in a convenience store and asked if he could microwave something. The clerk saw what he/she thought was a severed penis in the man's hand and understandably freaked out.
Initial reports suggested that a man had cut his penis off in the washroom and then for some reason wanted to warm it up. "Would you like sour kraut with that sir?"
The truth is even sillier. Apparently a woman was required to take a drug test at work. Not confident that she would pass she acquired one of those fake penises that are specifically designed to use for drug testing. Apparently it didn't occur to her that a drug test supervisor might be alarmed when she exposed her "penis." She asked a male friend to pee into the penis (it is actually just a resevoir for pee) and he wanted to microwave it before she went for her test so the pee would be warm as expected. Nevermind that it came out of a penis!
This story by itself seems to prove the value of drug testing. Although IQ testing might achieve the same result in this case.
Recently in Pittsburg a man walked up to the counter in a convenience store and asked if he could microwave something. The clerk saw what he/she thought was a severed penis in the man's hand and understandably freaked out.
Initial reports suggested that a man had cut his penis off in the washroom and then for some reason wanted to warm it up. "Would you like sour kraut with that sir?"
The truth is even sillier. Apparently a woman was required to take a drug test at work. Not confident that she would pass she acquired one of those fake penises that are specifically designed to use for drug testing. Apparently it didn't occur to her that a drug test supervisor might be alarmed when she exposed her "penis." She asked a male friend to pee into the penis (it is actually just a resevoir for pee) and he wanted to microwave it before she went for her test so the pee would be warm as expected. Nevermind that it came out of a penis!
This story by itself seems to prove the value of drug testing. Although IQ testing might achieve the same result in this case.
Monday, February 27, 2006
its the end of the world as we know it
do you feel fine????
There are some things out there that simply make me shake my head.
Two cases in point:
1) there is a religous group in the US (actually they mostly seem to be family members of the head of this particular Baptist Church somewhere in Kentucky - I will avoid the cliche joke about relatives and Kentucky but this does not seem to be a particularly deep gene pool)that goes around cheering and praising God at military funerals. That's correct people, these Americans celebrate US deaths in Iraq and Afganistan as they believe these deaths are Devine retribution for homosexuality in the US. They believe that God is killing American soldiers in Iraq (I suppose it is less messy than smiting them locally???) to punish Americans for allowing homosexuality. It seems that they appreciate God's subtlety - I would never have made that connection - and feel that a more direct approach (a plague of locusts across the midwest perhaps - letting Dick Cheney hunt quail in New York City) would be too in your face. It seems incredible that these folks cheer and sing hymns of thanks at military funerals. God - if you're listening - the message isn't getting through and these wingnuts are probably being counter productive. How about a burning bush or pictures of Pat Roberts with Heath Ledger - maybe then the Americans will get it. Remember these folks made Roseanne Barr and Nick Lachey celebrities. They don't get subtlety.
2) a 37 year old woman in Georgia (see above Kentucky reference) married the 15 year old friend of her son after she became pregnant with his child. Can you say high school cougar fantasy people? Can you say overwhelming shame - my Mom slept with my biology lab partner? She is now charged with statutory rape but is claiming that the law allowed her to marry him (the minimum age is 16 unless pregancy is involved) which then makes the rape charge moot. The boys grandma is saying he wants a divorce and things will likely get weirder for everyone before it is settled.
There are some things out there that simply make me shake my head.
Two cases in point:
1) there is a religous group in the US (actually they mostly seem to be family members of the head of this particular Baptist Church somewhere in Kentucky - I will avoid the cliche joke about relatives and Kentucky but this does not seem to be a particularly deep gene pool)that goes around cheering and praising God at military funerals. That's correct people, these Americans celebrate US deaths in Iraq and Afganistan as they believe these deaths are Devine retribution for homosexuality in the US. They believe that God is killing American soldiers in Iraq (I suppose it is less messy than smiting them locally???) to punish Americans for allowing homosexuality. It seems that they appreciate God's subtlety - I would never have made that connection - and feel that a more direct approach (a plague of locusts across the midwest perhaps - letting Dick Cheney hunt quail in New York City) would be too in your face. It seems incredible that these folks cheer and sing hymns of thanks at military funerals. God - if you're listening - the message isn't getting through and these wingnuts are probably being counter productive. How about a burning bush or pictures of Pat Roberts with Heath Ledger - maybe then the Americans will get it. Remember these folks made Roseanne Barr and Nick Lachey celebrities. They don't get subtlety.
2) a 37 year old woman in Georgia (see above Kentucky reference) married the 15 year old friend of her son after she became pregnant with his child. Can you say high school cougar fantasy people? Can you say overwhelming shame - my Mom slept with my biology lab partner? She is now charged with statutory rape but is claiming that the law allowed her to marry him (the minimum age is 16 unless pregancy is involved) which then makes the rape charge moot. The boys grandma is saying he wants a divorce and things will likely get weirder for everyone before it is settled.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Freedom Fries and Roses of the Prophet Mohammad
Well this is getting a bit silly.
When France opposed the Iraqi invasion the US Congressional Cafetria renamed French Fries as Freedom Fries. While the Germans also opposed the war they did not rename German measles (a congressinal source suggested that they wanted to name a few more ailments after dissenters but French herpes just seemed a bit over the top).
Now Iraq has renamed Danish pastries. You now need to order Roses of the Prophet Mohammad when you hit the bakery in Tehran. Also apparently (assuming Scandanavian guilt by association) Swedish meatballs will be renamed Mecca (all beef) meatballs. In what appears to be an error of interpretation they have also renamed the finish line as the line where the race ends.
When France opposed the Iraqi invasion the US Congressional Cafetria renamed French Fries as Freedom Fries. While the Germans also opposed the war they did not rename German measles (a congressinal source suggested that they wanted to name a few more ailments after dissenters but French herpes just seemed a bit over the top).
Now Iraq has renamed Danish pastries. You now need to order Roses of the Prophet Mohammad when you hit the bakery in Tehran. Also apparently (assuming Scandanavian guilt by association) Swedish meatballs will be renamed Mecca (all beef) meatballs. In what appears to be an error of interpretation they have also renamed the finish line as the line where the race ends.
Australians are uber cool
From cnn.com
In an unsual ruling, the grave site of AC/DC singer Bon Scott in Fremantle Cemetery in Western Australia was classified with a heritage listing Wednesday.
There are not a lot of countries in the world that would designate the grave site of a raunchy hard living rock star who died in his early 30's by drowing on his own puke in the back seat of a car. Its not discovering insulin or pioneering UN peacekeeping but you've got to start somewhere.
While High Voltage was an influential album in my youth, I am not inclined to visit this heritage site if I get to Australia. It does, however, kind of make me think that Australia might be an interesting place to visit. That and the Crocodile Dundee movies. Oh yeah and Kangaroo Jack.
In a similar vein, perhaps we should designate the El Mocambo (or wherever the Prime Minister's wife (Margaret Trudeau) did whatever it was she did with the Rolling Stones) a heritage site. Canadian history just got a whole lot more interesting.
Its a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll.
In an unsual ruling, the grave site of AC/DC singer Bon Scott in Fremantle Cemetery in Western Australia was classified with a heritage listing Wednesday.
There are not a lot of countries in the world that would designate the grave site of a raunchy hard living rock star who died in his early 30's by drowing on his own puke in the back seat of a car. Its not discovering insulin or pioneering UN peacekeeping but you've got to start somewhere.
While High Voltage was an influential album in my youth, I am not inclined to visit this heritage site if I get to Australia. It does, however, kind of make me think that Australia might be an interesting place to visit. That and the Crocodile Dundee movies. Oh yeah and Kangaroo Jack.
In a similar vein, perhaps we should designate the El Mocambo (or wherever the Prime Minister's wife (Margaret Trudeau) did whatever it was she did with the Rolling Stones) a heritage site. Canadian history just got a whole lot more interesting.
Its a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Bad Judgement in the Age of the Internet
About six weeks ago I read about an incident at the University of Western Ontario. Apparently some young men wanted to celebrate a 19th birthday in residence with a stripper. As strippers apparently won't go to a University residence common room (which strikes me as a smart policy) they were stymied until one of the women in the residence volunteered to substitute. Its tough to know the specific circumstances but I'm guessing (hoping) she's experiencing signficant regret.
Numerous digital photos, her name and home town are now posted all over the Internet. I read the story in my local paper (not more than a paragraph) and googled Western Ontario Stipper and there she was. Difficult to believe she was a spontaneous amateur but . . . . .
Now I did some dumb/crazy things during University. One or two were even captured on 35 mm film. Nowadays even the guys in the background enjoying the stripper are seen glassy eyed and drooling all over the world wide web. The consequences of stupid decisions seem to be much more dramatic today.
Definitely a cautionary tale.
Numerous digital photos, her name and home town are now posted all over the Internet. I read the story in my local paper (not more than a paragraph) and googled Western Ontario Stipper and there she was. Difficult to believe she was a spontaneous amateur but . . . . .
Now I did some dumb/crazy things during University. One or two were even captured on 35 mm film. Nowadays even the guys in the background enjoying the stripper are seen glassy eyed and drooling all over the world wide web. The consequences of stupid decisions seem to be much more dramatic today.
Definitely a cautionary tale.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Is God a Steelers Fan?
Apparently God had forsaken the starving masses in Africa and is laying off the Pope on all the contraception stuff. He has bigger fish to fry. He's thinking about which NFL team Atwaan Randle El should play for.
Antwaan Randle El, who is a free agent and a hot commodity, said he is asking God whether he should stay with the Steelers or go to another NFL team. "I am not sure if this is where God wants me to continue to be or if he wants me to go elsewhere," he said. "I just have to keep praying about it."
I just hope he helps Mr El make a decision soon so that God can smite those folks that are burning Churches in the US South. You know there are other God Fearing free agents in the NFL and the end of basketball season and hockey season is coming soon too (and don't forget that Roger Clemons still needs to make a decision)its hardly surprising that God hasn't had the time to smite a few more terrorists or keep Brokeback Mountain out of the Oscar running.
By the way God - thanks for the help with the Blue Jays - can you whisper something to one more outfielder - I'd still like to replace Frank Catalanotto.
Antwaan Randle El, who is a free agent and a hot commodity, said he is asking God whether he should stay with the Steelers or go to another NFL team. "I am not sure if this is where God wants me to continue to be or if he wants me to go elsewhere," he said. "I just have to keep praying about it."
I just hope he helps Mr El make a decision soon so that God can smite those folks that are burning Churches in the US South. You know there are other God Fearing free agents in the NFL and the end of basketball season and hockey season is coming soon too (and don't forget that Roger Clemons still needs to make a decision)its hardly surprising that God hasn't had the time to smite a few more terrorists or keep Brokeback Mountain out of the Oscar running.
By the way God - thanks for the help with the Blue Jays - can you whisper something to one more outfielder - I'd still like to replace Frank Catalanotto.
Is that Quayle or Quail?
So the US VEEP shoots a hunting companion. I'm sure there are lot's of shooting lawyer jokes going around (I heard his popularity went up when Americans heard it was a lawyer). I'll leave that to others. I was amazed, however, to read the following quote from the owner of the ranch where the accident occured.
"I would shoot with Dick Cheney everywhere, anywhere, and not think twice about it," she said Sunday night. But she said, "The nature of quail shooting ensures that this will happen. It goes with the turf."
Apparently its just obvious that you will occassionally hit your hunting companion with 200 pieces of buckshot. Perfectly natural. Its amazing he didn't shoot more people? What is this? Like a pinata . . they blind fold a guy with a shot gun spin him around a couple of times . . . let him loose and yell there's one, there's one? Are these peabrained birds so smart as to fly in front of a hunting companion regardless and the hunters so dumb that they inevitably shoot the companion too so as not to miss a nice quail dinner? Ever heard of chicken wings people? There has to be a way to make it safer?
On another note, I understand Saddam has been told he is forgiven and as a sign that the US means it he has been invited to go hunting with the VEEP.
"I would shoot with Dick Cheney everywhere, anywhere, and not think twice about it," she said Sunday night. But she said, "The nature of quail shooting ensures that this will happen. It goes with the turf."
Apparently its just obvious that you will occassionally hit your hunting companion with 200 pieces of buckshot. Perfectly natural. Its amazing he didn't shoot more people? What is this? Like a pinata . . they blind fold a guy with a shot gun spin him around a couple of times . . . let him loose and yell there's one, there's one? Are these peabrained birds so smart as to fly in front of a hunting companion regardless and the hunters so dumb that they inevitably shoot the companion too so as not to miss a nice quail dinner? Ever heard of chicken wings people? There has to be a way to make it safer?
On another note, I understand Saddam has been told he is forgiven and as a sign that the US means it he has been invited to go hunting with the VEEP.
Friday, February 03, 2006
You'll never hear George Bush say this - or Steven Harper!!
Silvio Burlusconi is the Prime Minister of Italy. Whereas Steven Harper opened his campaign with a promise to lower the GST, Silvio opened his campaign for the end of April elections by promising not to have sex till the election was over.
While the reasons for promising this is unclear it raises several questions:
1) I assume he is still allowed to screw the voters collectively just not individually (or if so many of those Italian sterotypes are true - in small groups - Silvio Caligula?????)
2) While he remains Prime Minister, is he still Master of his Domain???
While the reasons for promising this is unclear it raises several questions:
1) I assume he is still allowed to screw the voters collectively just not individually (or if so many of those Italian sterotypes are true - in small groups - Silvio Caligula?????)
2) While he remains Prime Minister, is he still Master of his Domain???
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Its not easy being Green
So the Conservatives "won" the Canadian election and we'll all get happily on with our lives. A bit of ex post analysis (read ranting) may be warranted.
I am amazed at the degree to which the pundits are saying that the Conservatives won this great victory. It seems to me they increased their seats substantially but I really expected more. The growth in Quebec is very interesting and suggested at first to me that Quebecers thought they could get into government with a vote for the Conservatives. A decrease in Bloc vote would support that hypothesis. On the other hand it looks mostly likely like a federalist leap from Liberals to the Conservatives. I really don't understand why the people of Quebec are so much more offended by the "sponsorship" scandal than others in Canada but it seems they were. The Conservatives fell far short of my expectations and I think they blew the opportunity.
I was surprised that the Liberals didn't do worse. This could have been a masacre of Kim Campbellian proportions but they kept it together despite a definitive schadenfreude in the media. I'm a historic Conservative supporter and really thought they were treated unfairly and held up remarkably well. A large number of other Canadians seemed to think so to. Now they ditch Paul Martin and elect some other wiener and we'll see where it goes.
It will be interesting to see how Stephen Harper does. Can he get rid of the discomfort and distrust Canadians feel about him and his band of rightwing men before Canadians fall in love with Frank McKenna or Michael Ignatieff? Its a race for the hearts of Canadians to see who forms the next majority government.
Its kind of like a mail order bride (work with me on this one) because everyone wants a majority (to get married) but none of the choices seem that great. I was disillusioned with the whole process and voted Green. There seems to be no where for Libertarians to go. Greens had some interesting things to say. My home riding is so overwhelmingly Conservative that this was low risk.
Sorry Jack - can't take you seriously.
It will be an interesting parliament. It will be really interesting to see if we migrate to some sort of proportional representation as the Conservatives and the NDP (and my Greens) seem to advocate. That would make things interesting on an ongoing basis (or perhaps solidfy the two party system??) and be a nightmare for the Bloc. Does that require a consitutional change.
I am amazed at the degree to which the pundits are saying that the Conservatives won this great victory. It seems to me they increased their seats substantially but I really expected more. The growth in Quebec is very interesting and suggested at first to me that Quebecers thought they could get into government with a vote for the Conservatives. A decrease in Bloc vote would support that hypothesis. On the other hand it looks mostly likely like a federalist leap from Liberals to the Conservatives. I really don't understand why the people of Quebec are so much more offended by the "sponsorship" scandal than others in Canada but it seems they were. The Conservatives fell far short of my expectations and I think they blew the opportunity.
I was surprised that the Liberals didn't do worse. This could have been a masacre of Kim Campbellian proportions but they kept it together despite a definitive schadenfreude in the media. I'm a historic Conservative supporter and really thought they were treated unfairly and held up remarkably well. A large number of other Canadians seemed to think so to. Now they ditch Paul Martin and elect some other wiener and we'll see where it goes.
It will be interesting to see how Stephen Harper does. Can he get rid of the discomfort and distrust Canadians feel about him and his band of rightwing men before Canadians fall in love with Frank McKenna or Michael Ignatieff? Its a race for the hearts of Canadians to see who forms the next majority government.
Its kind of like a mail order bride (work with me on this one) because everyone wants a majority (to get married) but none of the choices seem that great. I was disillusioned with the whole process and voted Green. There seems to be no where for Libertarians to go. Greens had some interesting things to say. My home riding is so overwhelmingly Conservative that this was low risk.
Sorry Jack - can't take you seriously.
It will be an interesting parliament. It will be really interesting to see if we migrate to some sort of proportional representation as the Conservatives and the NDP (and my Greens) seem to advocate. That would make things interesting on an ongoing basis (or perhaps solidfy the two party system??) and be a nightmare for the Bloc. Does that require a consitutional change.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Off and ranting
Its been a while since I've had the opportunity for a stream of conciousness rant but I'll give it a try. Here are some quick "what were they thinking" thoughts.
- A couple recently kidnapped a woman in southern Ontario somewhere and tried to get a ransom. When none was forthcoming, they took her to a strip club and tried to make her lap dance for tips so they could raise some cash. Apparently they hadn't considered the possibility that she might try to get help. They got busted. Are some people really that stupid?
- I will preface this one by saying that I am opposed to the death penalty but this one made me wonder. The State of California yesterday executed a 76 year old man who was found guilty of a number of murders. There did not appear to be any doubt as to his guilt.
1) Opponents said it was cruel and unusually to execute and old and sickly man so he should be spared. Am I to understand that its better to kill a young person in robust health? This seems ridiculous.
2) The man had suffered a heart attack in September and had been nursed back to health. He had requested that he not be resuscitated if he were to suffer another. With no hint of a smile, a representative of the Department of Corrections said that they had to "respect the sanctity of life" and could not stand by and watch him die without resuscitation. They would intervene so that they could kill him later. This. too, seems ridiculous. Look up irony in the dictionary. It may say something about taking heroic measures to save someone's life againstg thier will so you can stick a needle in their arm and kill them later. - Why do people drive in the fast lane if they are going slow and no one is in the slow lane????? I commute an hour each way every day and it boggles my mind how many idiots feel the need to stay in the left lane of a four lane highway when the right one is empty. Inconsiderate? Stupid? Blissfully unaware?? All of the above? One guy was going 5 km below the limit the other day and gave me the finger when I passed him on the right with no other cars within 500 metres. If you do that on the autobahn in Germany they will right you a ticket. They should do the same in North America.
- Someone paid $25,000 US for William Shatner's kidney stone. Need I say more. The end is near.
- Textbook publishers need to figure out that the Internet exists. They publish different international editions of the same textbook and price it highest in North America where they feel they can extract the most money. It seems unreasonable, though, that I can buy a book new online and ship it here (for more than the book costs me) and still be about 25% of the way to a new copy of the book at my University bookstore. And they are complaining that they are selling fewer books in North America.
- why do I know that Leif Garret got arrested? Why is Angelina's pregnancy on the front page of my paper (though not in the economist - shameless plug) right next to suicide bombings in Iraq and news on the Canadian election? See William Shatner's kidney stone above.
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